Letting go without giving up. | Reisha Sharon | TEDxGCS Sharjah Youth
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqGzsSlojb8 Video ID: YqGzsSlojb8 ============================================================ [Music] When did life become a competition? Was it the first time we were graded? The moment we saw someone faster, smarter, or more talented? Or was it when we realized the world doesn't wasn't just watching what we did. It was measuring it. When we're younger, the weight of the world doesn't hit us all at once. It arrives slowly in soft nudges and gentle whispers. But as we grow older, there seems to be an invisible current pushing us further and further into the so-called real world. And once we're in it, one of the first things we encounter, often without realizing it, is comparison. First, we compare surface level things. Beauty, money, clothes. But quietly lurking in the background is something far more personal, the comparison of achievement. We become our own harshest critics. I remember giving a class presentation where everyone laughed at the right time and they seemed engaged. Yet, all I could remember was the one line I had stumbled on, replaying it endlessly like it had ruined everything I had done. And what made it even harder was listening to the other speakers. They didn't seem to stutter or look nervous at all. And suddenly, the only thing I could do was tear myself apart. In comparison, this is something most teenagers know all too well. It's like standing on a neverending staircase. You take one step up only to look around and realize someone else is already 10 steps ahead. You start to wonder if you'll ever catch up or worse, if you were meant to be on the staircase at all. These days, it feels like everyone around us is doing something impressive. Winning awards, launching projects, speaking on stages. And no matter how hard we try, we can't help but think someone else is doing it better. We wish we were them. We wonder if we're enough. I remember volunteering for every single activity, doing everything I could, hoping it would finally be enough. But no matter how much I did, it always felt like someone I didn't even know was doing it better than me. I kept trying again and again and again, hoping that maybe next time I finally feel like I was enough. But when is enough ever truly enough? Is it when we win, when we're praised? Or is it when we finally stop needing validation to feel valuable? Psychologists call this the contingent selfworth. When your sense of value depends entirely on success, approval, or achievements. But here's the trap. When you do well, you feel amazing. But the second something doesn't go right, your confidence crumbles. You start seeing failure not just as setback, but as a reflection of who you are. That was me. I had tied my worth so tightly to what I could achieve that when I fell short, I didn't just feel disappointed. I felt like I had failed as a person. And what made it even harder was how invisible it all was. Nobody tells you when you're burning up. They just keep clapping, keep praising until you lose track of whether you're doing it for yourself or just to feel enough. But trust me, tying our work to our achievements is not the best way to live. And it's certainly not the best way to grow. And that brings me to the heart of this talk. A mentality that is how we reset. Letting go without giving up. It seems simple, but trust me, it's one of the hardest things to do because we're taught to cling to effort, to results, to recognition. letting go. That feels like failure until it doesn't. Now, what does letting go without giving up entail? To help explain this, let me share a shift in outlook. One rule that really sums up the concept of it. Learn to separate your work from your work. This means your potential isn't defined by what you've achieved, but the experiences and things you have learned along the way. I've had to remind myself of this again and again, especially in moments when things hadn't gone the way I planned. However, this attitude can sometimes be misunderstood. People take it as an excuse to stop trying, to become so comfortable where they are that they forget we're meant to grow. Letting go doesn't mean letting yourself go. It's letting go of fear, letting go of pressure, letting go of perfection, but never ever letting go of growth. When we don't let go, we carry everything, every doubt, every harsh word like heavy luggage. And the more we carry, the harder it is to move. Letting go is a weakness. It's choosing to travel light so we can go further. It's saying, "I didn't get the win, but I got something better." A reason to go. Not giving up isn't about pushing through blindly. It's about choosing how you respond. Sometimes it means taking a step back, reassessing, and moving forward if you're a lack. Other times it's staying consistent with the small things, showing up, putting in the effort, and trusting that progress takes time. The key is to treat setbacks as feedback, not failure. Instead of letting disappointments define you, ask yourself what it can teach you. Remember, growth isn't always loud or obvious. Often, it happens in the quiet moments. When you stay steady, practice patient, and keep building resilience. That's where the real strength is found. We can't tie our work to our wins, but we also can't stop thriving. The strength lies in the middle where we pause, breathe, reset, and still choose to move forward. I won't pretend I mastered this. There are still days I compare, still moments I doubt. But each time I try to come back to this reset to remember that my worth isn't up for debate. So try this. Start seeing yourself as someone full of potential, not just at the checklist of achievements waiting to be completed. With control auto, you don't erase who you are. You clear the clutter, reset the envelope, and make space for what you're coming. [Applause]