10-20-10: Level Up Your Confidence Through Public Speaking | Kosal Sin | TEDxPhnom Penh
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jO3vH68GHAo Video ID: jO3vH68GHAo ============================================================ Okay, I have one important question to ask everyone here. How many of you are falling in love with someone? Rest your hand. Okay. Still rest your hand. Okay. Okay. Still holding your hand. How about those who still falling in love with your wife or your husband? Rest your hands up. Okay. Okay. Thank you. I I also have to rest up my hand because my wife is here >> and I want to tell her that I love you so much. >> [applause] >> I am not I am here not to tell you about how to show us love but I'm here to tell you how to level up your confidence in public speaking. But before that let me share you a short story of mine. 19 years ago I was not confident whenever I was asked to speak in front of many people like this I was very very nervous very nervous have you ever got that kind of experience I'm sure you have then one of my friends recommend me to join a public speaking club where I can improve my public speaking skills but join finding just only one session. I quit because I was so scared. Two years later, I decided to go back to the club. And this time, I told myself that I would never ever quit again. Yes, I won myself. I always shows up every week, practice every session until I became confident and I also end up being as a public speaking trainer. Professor Simoon said, "No pain, no gain, but too much pain, we all going to die soon." Luckily, I could manage my pain. That's why I come I'm I'm here today. In 2017, I started my own training and a year later, I was given an opportunity to teach students public speaking and presentation skills at a university which I have never dreamed of. The ability to communicate is a viral field. I mean a viral skill for all fields including accountants, science, architects and others. In business, we also have to give a lot of speeches to promote about our products and brands. For graduate students, they also have to give a lot of presentation in their class. And that's why Chris Adderson the founder of T is presentation literacy is not an optional extra for the few. It is a core skill for the 21st century and I totally agree. It's been many years around seven years that I've been training conducting public speaking in different universities, organizations and companies and I'm so thankful that I have found the techniques that I can level up their confidence and also their public speaking skills and today I would like to share you that technique. So the technique is 10 20110. So what is 10 20110? 10 days, 20 hours and 10 tips. Okay. So why 10 days? According to one author, his name is Lenny, 10 days to more confident public speaking. He say we just need 10 days to build up our foundation in public speaking. Just 10 days. I remember when I applied this technique with my students, they joined the 10-day training without missing a single session and I could see the result. They could build up their confidence and also their public speaking skills. You don't have to spend many years like me to build up that foundation. All you need is just 10 days. And the question to all of you is that can you do it consistently for 10 days? >> Yes. >> Yes. >> Okay. Very good. Why 20 hours? If you have watched the t Mr. Josh, the first 20 hours, how to learn anything. And he also an author. The first 20 hours, how to learn anything, including public speaking skills. So what should I do with that 20 hours? All you need is two hours per day for 10 days. And another question, what should I do with that two hours per day? One of the recommended from the expert is recording your own video. How many of you scaring like recording your own video? Oh, that's a lot of so you should do it. I remember my when I did my first video, I also was very scared. I did only two minutes, but I spent two hours It's not that easy, right? When you recorded your own video, when you make the mistake, what happened next? You record it again, right? And then you did it again and again and again. So this is how you practice. Sometime you don't know that the time that you do it again and again and again, that's how you build up your skill. So spend that two hours to build your confidence and also your public speaking skill by recording your own self. Everyone start from the beginning. It's not that easy but everyone can do it. The next one is why 10 tips. According to one author, 10 tips for mastering public speaking and overcoming stage fright by Watash one tip per day for 10 days. Easy, right? Just one tip per day. So, let's go to the first tip together. Positive mindset. How many of you thinks that you can win yourself? Okay, that's a lot, right? Okay, very good. Thank you. I did not win myself when I joined the public speaking club for at the beginning. Why? Because I use a lot of negative phrase like I cannot do this. I cannot control my fear. I cannot you know speak well. So when I have that kinds of negative mindset, I quit. I give up on myself and I did not win myself. But two years later when I come back I changed the way I talk to myself. And this time I talk to myself that I can try. I can try. I can control my fear. So this is something very important. Everything start from our mind. You are what you think is very very important. I remember one phrase from Jack Canfield that I always tell myself. I am lovable and capable. So everyone, can you repeat? I am lovable and capable. One more timeable. [screaming] >> Thank you. So start with something positive to yourself. It's very important. [clears throat] You are what you think. The next one is passion. The world champion of public speaking 2014 Dana Jaya he said that passion is the key in building our confidence. So when you are passionate about something you will put 100% to make it work right. So that's why when you show your passion you also show your confidence. Show your passion. I would like to seek your cooperation. I want you to do it 100%. Okay. I want you to drop everything on your hand and then we're going to chop something. Okay. Yes. Um please. So, I want you to do this. Uh, I'm going to make the sound like, "Oh, [screaming] yes." Okay. 100%. Okay. Are you ready? >> All right. I'm going to count. One, [screaming] two, three. OH, >> YES. >> [applause] >> It's not just only in public speaking, even in your work or any other things. Put 100%. Okay? You're going to love it. The next one is practice, but you need to pass feedback. Practice is important, but getting feedback is even more important. Have you got anyone to give you feedback after you give a speech? Maybe yes, maybe no. Right? Some people they don't want to get the feedback. But remember, I'm here today and a lot of people in my public speaking club, they are better because of the feedback. We believe that we have room for improvement. That's why it's very important to get feedback for our improvement. And the next one that I would like you to talk to your partner, I want you to say, "I love feedback." Turn to your partner and say something. I love feedback. Okay? Don't say, "I love you." Okay? I love feedback. Yes. Thank you very much. I think it's the same thing. It's not just only in public speaking. In other field even we are working, we also need feedback for our growth, for our next improvement. The next one is structure. Some people tell me they don't know where to start and they don't know where to end. And that's why we need a proper structure. Very simple. I think a lot of people they know introduction, body and conclusion. Talk to your audience at the beginning. Tell them something important in the middle and make them remember something at the end. So this is something that I want you to apply in your speech. Danagi the art of public speaking I mean he writes a book he said that tell them what you're going to tell them tell them and tell them what you told them. Okay that's for the structure. The next one is engagement. Have you ever asked question to your audience? Yes. Yes. Have you asked your audience to imagine about something? Yes. Actually, there are a lot of techniques that you can engage the audience. But as long as you engage them to think, you know, physically or mentally or being active, you win the attention. So that's why you need to engage, engage, engage, engage your audience. The next one, tip number six, hand gesture. Both of your hands are very powerful, right? I believe that when I do this, okay, and this, you know what I mean? Even I don't say anything. That's why both of your hands are very powerful. Use it to reinforce your message. You have that both hand is very, very powerful. All right. Next that I want you to do, I want you to do this. Okay. Just do it all together. Can can can have your support. Okay. And then I want you to say I love you. And then Okay. You ready? Okay. One, two, three. I love you. Okay. Do it when you go back home to someone that you love. Or maybe you can do it now. Here. Hand gesture. The next one is eye context. I think it's very important that we need to focus to be present. Give attention to your audience. They are here because they want to listen to you. And of course, you need to give attention back to you to them as well. Connect, connect, connect. It's very important. Another challenge I I know that a lot of people they dare not to look at people eyes because there's a lot of thing that happening in their head. They think about something. But today I would like you to challenge yourself. Now I want you to look at your partner for three seconds. Look into their eyes. Okay? Look into their eyes. Can you do that? Like look into the uh partner, your someone that's sitting next to you. Look into their eyes. All right. Yeah, you will see something. All right. Thank you. Very good. Connect, connect, connect. Tip number eight, pitch. How many of you thinks that your voice is not good or maybe you think that it's not interesting? Yeah. Oh, that's a lot. Oh my god. Yes. I I it's happened a lot of people say that they don't like their voice. But I want to tell you that your boy is very very beautiful. What you need to learn is to train it. You train yourself and focus on the important key words. Stress on the important key words. For example, I really really love you. Again, I really really love you. If you say like I really love you, it's going to be different, right? Okay. So, can you say it to your partner? [laughter] Okay. If you want stress on the important keywords, visual ads you say is one thing, but when you show them, it's even more powerful. And that's why it is a plus if you have the visual aid to support your presentation. Use it to reinforce your presentation. They love to see something from you too. And last but not least, the emotions. We connect it by emotions, not data, not information, but emotions. In a book called the TED uh the TED talks book they say that emotion is a key element that can connect inspire and entertain the audience and that's why you need to put your emotion every time you speak put your emotion I think our speakers they put that kind of emotion to connect to all of you last activity that I would like you to do I want you to thank you with your emotion to your partner. Say thank you for being here. Thank you for sitting next to me. Thank you for everything. Please everyone, thank you. Yes, appreciate it. Uh some people even kiss each other. Oh my god. Okay. And that's all the 10 days, 20 hours, and 10 tips. So please use it because this is something that can help you to build up your confidence to another level. I I know that everyone you wants to build up your confidence. So if so please use that technique 10 days, 20 hours and 10. [snorts] Thank you. [applause]