Transcript

Words That Rule the World | Rabi’ah Fakunle | TEDxSummit University Offa

[Music] There was an inaugural lecture by a professor which we all know. The title of the inaugural lecture was eat and die by little. I think then I was in the university when that topic came up and I was still a student and I was angry. I started asking my friends how would someone write something like this eat and die by little. We had several interpretations to it that okay if you should go there what will happen? Eat and die by little. Is it that whatever it is we eat we are going to die or what the lies. So the third professor ended up being my VC where I schooled that's Alhika University professor. So we attended the inaugural lecture like a video for the inaugural lecture and on um getting there during inaugural lectures they give us food. We always have maybe rice drinks and at the end we were given nothing. We only given water. So from the inaugural lecture what we were able to pick is he being a biochemist he's trying to tell us that whatever it is we eat bit by bit there are certain elements that can actually make us or mar us and he ended up the um what's it called the inaugural lecture by saying he has already preached about the kind of foods we eat so he won't be serving any refreshments what he can talk about is just water he's very sure water has no what's um ill to us. So over the years I realized that most of the friendship I have made by virtue of the things I say most times I'll ask how did we get to be friends like Arab was a certain time you just told me you saw me crying or we were doing a joint work I told you don't worry we'll pass there were times we had classes and we had zero and you tell me just let's look at the bright side that those words you just felt okay this is somebody I could move my things with. Where am I headed? We just realize that most times words move us by our spouses, our parents, where we meet. Sometimes people say things and you cringe. You want to talk back because those words are heavy. So when I kept growing up, at the time I wanted to get married, my mom told me something. She said, "Rabbi, when you get married, you would hear things." And you know like the last speaker said he talked about cross culture. I am a my husband is Euroba. You would meet people. You would hear things. Whenever those words are coming this is what you should do. Ensure that if it gets to a level you can't take it anymore. Put water in your mouth and keep saying this water must not just keep the water in your mouth till the storm is over. So I did it once twice. It wasn't easy. I was like, "Ah, what is my mommy trying to tell me?" And that was when I now realized that they are what we call the apparent and the hidden when it comes to word choice. My mom was not telling me that I should put water in my mouth. She knows I can't do that forever. She's just trying to tell me that she decides more patience when it comes to relating with people. So when you look at our political realm from um Africa setting, foreign setting, you see that when politicians come out to pitch their words, they're mindful of their words. They use collective like we can, we shall move together. You see that collectivism coming together to show us that the words we use can actually take us far. Recently we there's a platform here in this university. So there was a post where it was written may your road be rough and there were arguments. I was silent but deep down sometime I was tilting towards okay yes may your road be rough I understand where it's coming from. And the other angle where the physicist talked about something yes I was tilting towards that. Now it all depends on the angle, the time and the space. So what I'm trying to say here is that our word choice can differ. It might be pragmatic. Sometimes some words are said are not meant and some words are meant and not said. So we have to be very intentional about the words we use. It mustn't be so long. Myself, I am a linguist, but I try as much as possible not to use verbose languages. I try as much as possible. I don't say words to impress and let her put myself in trouble. Little little words we use like be fine, we can do it. How do we do it? How can I help out? Yes, sorry. Thank you. I had an issue with someone sometimes back and I said it. I said I was not going to have anything to do with the person again. And the question that was asked is what happened. I said all I wanted was thank you. Sorry comes in different forms. I am a kind of person that I sometimes I might be lost. I might be standing and I'll be lost. Sometimes when I'm reading I'm lost and somebody comes and the next minute I snap. I know I have that weakness and immediately I know sorry shouldn't be a word that is far from me. I should use it often. Now we are here. Let's ask personal questions. What choice of words do you use? What choice of words do you use? Do you sometimes look at something I can't do it? You have to be positive. Most times use the words I can. You don't have to talk so much. I can. This morning I had a presentation with my students. We've been working for a month and it's been very tedious. We've had roller coasters. We've had fights. We've had several things. But yesterday night I looked at it. I said, "Oh, we having a presentation today. How can I help the students?" I know the tension is heightened already and I got to the presentation I was like see let me tell you just do your thing let me tell you something I have a presentation this afternoon too you come and watch me so it's everywhere you always have heightened tension just do your thing just to be just talk and immediately they kept talking there was never a time I was like yes the person is there start giving gifts and all so it goes a long way to show that words make you or you now South African words it says Ubuntu Ubuntu states that I am because we are that's collectivism that words culture human are interwoven we are interconnected you can't talk about one without implicating the other and when you use words respective of religion culture where you're from and we have to be mindful of the choice of words we use we have to think before we talk Because sometimes what it is you feel you have to be intentional about the things you feel as an academic dealing with students. Sometimes you face situations where some words are just dished out and you want to retalate. So you also have to feel that those people you're using those words on are also human and what I can say most times I say word is love. You can't talk about love without talking about word. You can't talk about word. without without talking about pragmatics with the era of um um um media the atmosphere now cyber sphere you have a lot happening where people concort several thoughts what words have you used to bring yourself out of it so the core ideas we have to be very positive you see most times you see politicians let's use Jonathan example when he wanted to come he talked about not having shoes that he's not going to be taken a back about people not being able to process some things and all. He was being he made us feel endeared to him because of his choice of words and most often than not you bear with me that when you meet somebody you say ah I like the way the person talks or oh the way the person has talks has taken me off. So you don't what I'm trying to say is that you don't need so much to say when words are concerned just the little words like we can do it it's fine we'll be okay thank you let's collaborate little tips here and there can take us to where we feel we belong now to wrap this up I'm putting up a challenge to what words do you want to grow it yes words grow the world but we have the innate tendency or have that capability to rule those words that rule the world. So when we talk about the world, we are inclusive. Whatever it is we put in is what we put out. You can't give out what you don't have. Am I communicating? So in light of this, all I'm just trying to preach is love. Be intentional about the words you use. Ensure that whatever it is you say, you might not be able to correct it. You might just drop it and the person leaves. be intentional about this word I'm using now. What if I'm not there to defend it? So, we all get used to using words that are very little but goes a long way. Thank you. [Music]