Where Value Lies | Roanne Gonzales | TEDxUTCC
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlZV8fOi1dM Video ID: mlZV8fOi1dM ============================================================ Transcriber: Roanne Gonzales Reviewer: Sadegh Vahdati Nia If you were to travel 30 minutes west from the glamour of Sydney, you would find yourself in Auburn. It’s busy, loud, and each street you walk down sells spices from every corner of the world. It’s one of my favorite places to be because just around the corner of the train station, you would find the Women’s Creative Hub. It's a place where women from refugee and migrant backgrounds would come together to connect and make friends, usually over sharing a meal together or sharing arts from their culture. Now, why am I telling you this? How would this affect you and how has it affected me? When I was around eight years old, my parents told me and my sisters that we were going to go on this amazing adventure and we were so excited because we were going to go to the Philippines. It's where my parents were born and me and my sisters hadn't been before. So I was thinking to myself, “Wow, it’s going to be great. I’m going to eat all the food, go to all the islands and have this amazing time.” But once we arrived, we arrived in rural Philippines and instead of going to all the islands, my parents sent me and my sister to study at school where my dad went. And it was so different from my school back in Australia. There were dirt floors, no running water, and when I looked around me, a lot of my classmates didn’t have any shoes. And I remember sitting in that class and looking around and thinking to myself, “Whoa, my classmates are so smart.” If I was learning one plus one in Australia, they were already on five times seven. And I remember coming home and telling my parents, “Wow! these new friends of mine are so smart, they’re so cool. I wonder where they’ll be next time we come.” And that's when they told me something interesting. They said, “Yeah, I’m sure your classmates are really smart. And there's a lot of smart kids down the street. But a lot of them might not have the same opportunities you’re imagining.” In reality, all of these classmates of mine wouldn’t be able to finish school because it wasn't a priority. They would have to start working to provide for their families. And I remember after those few months and on the plane back home, I sat by myself and rather than feeling super excited and celebrating that trip, there was an odd feeling of discomfort. And looking back, I believe this feeling came from knowing that these new friends of mine weren’t in the right environment to be able to explore their skills and talents. I couldn’t do anything about it. I didn't even get to know them very well or see where they would end up. So as I grew up, I would try and involve myself in activities that would try and bridge this opportunity gap. And that’s what led me to the Women’s Creative Hub. More than being a place for women to connect and make friends with one another. I wanted to see if something could be done to help ease their transition into Australia. I thought to myself, Well, I’m not eight years old anymore. Maybe I have time, knowledge or a bit more maturity to do something. But I didn’t know where to start. Until one day, I came to the Hub as a part of my usual routine and came across a new face. This is Chris. Chris had arrived from India and she couldn’t speak any English and I couldn’t speak any Hindi. So, there was a bit of a language barrier, but I remember her silently sitting in one corner, effortlessly patching together these odd bits of fabric to create these beautiful aprons and scarves. I wanted to figure out how she did it so effortlessly. So I sat down next to her with a confused look on my face, and she took lead in gesturing to show me how she made them. This would become my weekly routine, and over the next few sessions, you could see her confidence grow with every woman she interacted with. Over shared smiles, confused looks and cups of tea. She eventually taught all of us without needing to say a word. We all know the common saying that, “if you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to fish, then you feed him for a lifetime.” Now, eating for a lifetime is great. But is it really all that fulfilling? Perhaps we can take this a step further. Beyond teaching someone to fish, it’s far greater to explore the skills that they already have. You see, skills reveal a lot. Think about a skill you’re really proud of. It can be anything. Cooking, singing or playing piano. How long did it take for you to get really good at it? They say it takes 10,000 hours to master something. So, when you’re seeing someone really talented, you’re seeing 10,000 hours of effort. But more than that, you’re seeing a glimpse into who they are, how they’ve spent their time, the environments they’ve been in, and what they value. As Chris shared her sewing skills with me, she didn’t need to say a word for me to see how sewing was intertwined with her life before Australia, how it gave her a sense of calm in a foreign environment, and how much pride and fulfilment it gave her in being able to share it with other people. Realizing this, I led a team of students to work with the Hub to see how we could grow beyond being a place where women could connect and share skills with one another, but a place where they could share those skills outward. You see? Beyond being a great way for understanding someone’s skills, being a great way for them to showcase their talents and break the ice and understand their stories, it’s a great way to affirm the value that that person already has to offer. That’s probably why so many of us spend so much time and effort to figure out what we’re good at. It feels good knowing we have something to share. It builds confidence, that is the necessary ingredient to take the next step forward. And I remember seeing this in action on International Women's Day. At the time, the women were busy preparing for this major event, there would be people from business, government and the whole community coming together and the women would be able to share dishes from their culture. But there was also one other opportunity. One of the women would be able to host a cooking demonstration in front of this crowd. But the question became: Who would do it? And to my surprise, Sawsan put her hands up for the challenge. Sawsan was one of the first ladies I met at the Hub. When I first met her, she would actually ask me and my team to speak to customers on her behalf because she felt uncomfortable even speaking to people. Just six months beforehand, she had just arrived in Australia, couldn’t speak any English and the thought of going outside and not knowing how to find her way back home or ask for help affirmed in her mind that it was best to just stay inside. And so she isolated herself for months. But that day, she confidently stood in front of a crowd of over 500 people showcasing her talents. And I remember watching her on stage and feeling so proud of how far she had come. And when I think back at it, there were so many events that led to that moment from taking the step outside and joining the Hub to teaching the new women her skills to running cooking classes in high schools. All of these events affirmed in her mind that she had something valuable to offer, and this was the necessary ingredient to take that next step. Today, Sawsan runs her own catering business that has even catered for multinational corporations. And despite her busy schedule, she still makes time to come into the hub to teach the new women that join. And the flow on effect doesn't even stop there. Sawan’s daughter, Gracie, who’s just a few years younger than me, would often come into the Hub and join her mom. And when I met Gracie, she would open up and tell me how she was worried that her stress and anxiety would prevent her from doing well in school or finding a job. But you know, each time she came into the Hub and helped someone with a workshop or showed someone some of her skills, you could see her confidence grow with every interaction. And today, she is the first in her family to go to and graduate from university. I actually caught up with Sawsan recently to talk about that moment on stage and asked her about a time she felt just as proud. And she recounted a moment before she came to Australia. Sawsan came from a war torn nation. And because of the Civil War, a lot of children were displaced, traumatized and left struggling to find food. So, Sawsan run a program that provided food and shelter to these children. But because this would cause children to come into town and cause a bit of trouble, and it also made it harder for the government to recruit these children to fight in the conflict. Sawsan was blacklisted and she was forced to leave. But even though it was these same activities that caused her to leave her loved ones behind, uproot her from her home and have her start rebuilding her life in Australia. It was these same events that gave her that sense of pride and fulfillment. And even though she had those few months of being isolated and not knowing what to do, she already had the skills, experience and talents to offer. The Hub really only provided a space to tap into that potential and give her that confidence needed to take the next step forward. For the other women at the Hub, fulfillment came in other forms. I remember coming in one day to a room that was buzzing with activity. There were tables lined up, fabric everywhere. And the moment the women saw me, they pulled me to a table to join in. And I was seated next to Nara. Nara had arrived from China and she was one of the ladies that really just came to the Hub for fun, to chat with our friends about how their kids were going at school or where the best discounts were. But that day, she was laser focused. She had a pile of T-shirts next to her and she was cutting strips at the bottom of each one, before tying them into a knot. And I remember turning to Nara and saying, “Nara, why are you so focused this week?” And she replied, she was too busy to chat because she was busy doing something for the community. That day, Nara and the other women were turning old shirts into bags, and these bags were being used to distribute food and supplies to vulnerable communities across Sydney. And this level of excitement and focus would always come whenever the women were commissioned to make something for the community, whether it was turning old council banners into library bags or creating corsages for the local high school. To be very honest with you, when I started leading my team to try and find these opportunities for the women, I believed that the core benefit we were providing was the additional income. And I measured our team success by the number of markets we had run, how much additional income we generated and how many partnerships we established. And while I don’t doubt that this additional income was useful, when I asked the women what they valued most about the Hub they said they valued the people and the opportunity to use their skills to give back. And when I think about it, I love the Hub for the same reasons. By being on the receiving end of the skills that they have shared, I’ve been able to be invited to the stories of their life before Australia, been in awe of their resilience and ability to bounce back and be amazed at their willingness to contribute to a community that they had just joined. I thought I joined the Hub to empower these women. But the reverse is true, too. By inviting me to use my skills to help the Hub grow, they gave me the confidence needed to lead teams that established social enterprises across Australia. And all of these enterprises were built on the same understanding that I developed at the Hub. That in order to empower someone, it's not just about giving something or even teaching something new, but it’s about shining the light on the value that that person already has to offer. And you know, taking this approach isn’t only great in helping that person build confidence by affirming their value, but you get something out of it too. I mean, why are you all here today listening to these talks? Throughout this event, It’s been so amazing to see how your facial expressions change or eyes light up whenever a new insight or idea comes to mind. And that’s probably why TED and TEDx get such a wide audience. There's something exciting about being exposed to the skills and stories of that person standing on stage. But you know, you don’t need to wait for another TED or TEDx conference. All around us, there are pockets of communities that are overlooked or underestimated. From the communities we’re told to ignore or avoid, that odd person class, or even our families. You don't have to travel too far to get a new perspective. For me, whenever life gets a little bit stressful or overwhelming, going down any loud or busy street would take me back to Auburn and the Hub and give me a sense of calm. It provides me with a reminder that no matter what happens, whether it’s a bad day or something that derails us completely and makes us feel as though we have to rebuild our life. We all have something valuable to offer. (Applause)