Sexual Violence Against Women | Azka Qureshi | TEDxYouth@BISI
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7FKMGTXoQ4 Video ID: n7FKMGTXoQ4 ============================================================ Transcriber: Areeba Ashfaq Reviewer: Walaa Mohammed Did you know the 1 in 3 women aged 11 to 17 gets sexually harassed or assaulted at least once in their adolescence? To put this into perspective Could the first three rows of four rows of the theater. Oh, wait, no. Three rows of the theater, please stand up. As you can see, this is a huge part of our society. Imagine that so many women will go through this, yet the crime may still go unreported due to fear, shame, isolation, or even not being believed. You can sit down now. So many victims will try to get the justice that they deserve, but will be accused of faking it. Imagine if this was your mother, sister, daughter, close friend or family member. How would you feel if nobody believed that more neglected their situation? Hi, I'm. And I'm here to talk to you about sexual violence against women. I once told somebody that I was genuinely afraid of boys and men I did not know. And he didn't even let me finish my sentence before declaring that I was crazy. In the same conversation, however, somebody mentioned their fear of sharks and everybody agreed that they shared that fear. Most people see a fear of sharks as natural and normal, But if you're boys and men is not. Even though there are only 73 shark attacks a year and over 730 million women who get sexually harassed every year, avoiding the sea because of a fear of sharks is normal and plausible. But women cannot avoid society forever. We need to be careful to do something as simple as taking out the trash. In fact, we may we may even need to be careful every single day of our lives. Yet we're often blamed for the crime. Women are often accused of faking it, even though a court even though only 40% of women actually report sexual harassment or try to get any form of help for it, the process of reporting rape or sexual harassment is not is very invasive and not at all for the weak. You'll be asked the same invasive questions time and time again and be examined in every nook and cranny of your body. What are the clothes I wear or the makeup that I apply have anything to do with how other people treat me? And what is the way I look change the way that change the amount of respect that I get? Is it truly my fault that somebody else wasn't able to perform any basic human decency or. Part of self control wasn't spoken about in more schools and households. Sexual violence has a huge impact on a person's life. It can change the perspective, the perspective of the world. Victims may not leave their houses for several years after the attack, and they may feel unsafe in safe environments. Last year, I was talking to a group of boys in my youth group and. About all the things that women have to go through. And I was told that it's not all men. Women get told all the time that it's not all men. And to be honest, I think I'm starting to believe them. It's not all men. It's not all men who are safe. It's not all men who are kind. It's not all men who are respectable. In reality, it's not all men. But 99% of perpetrators of sexual violence are men. And it's not all men, but it is 730 million women. We have all of this evidence to support that. This is a widespread problem, yet we continue to ignore it and put the blame back on the on the victims. So let me ask you a few questions. Would you blame the the victims of a murder for the fact that they've been murdered or the victims of gang violence for the fact that they've been targeted or the victims of mass shootings, for the fact that there was a shooting in their area? I'm going to assume that the answer is no. Then why do we blame the victims of sexual violence for the fact that they have been violated when we should be educating the population on the real impacts of the trauma that it causes Especially. When we should be respecting and empathizing with those who have been able to share their stories. And. Creating safer spaces and empowering those who haven't been able to. We need to shift the blame from the victim to the abuser. Instead of ignoring people when they come to us for help, we need to believe them and we need to help them. Nobody wants their privacy breached or their innocence and self-worth ripped away from them. This is a sexism embedded in our society. We are taught from a very young age. The boys are stronger than girls. This can be seen at school where teachers may ask if there's a group of strong boys. You can carry a stack of heavy books or even at home where girls are taught to sit like a girl or a told not to act like a boy. Meanwhile, we keep feeding harmful statements into the minds of young boys such as Don't Cry. Crying is for girls. Showing them that anger and aggression are the two or the only two emotions that they are allowed to experience. They may feel as though they're unworthy of love and respect if they aren't masculine. Do we really want our fathers, sons, brothers, close friends and family members to go through this? This sexism. Patriarchal society isn't just detrimental to women, but also to men. These harmful stereotypes may go some way to explaining why some men may go down a path of violence against women. Men should be able to experience their emotions and to feel vulnerable for their sake and ours. Feeling their emotions and not channeling anger as their main emotion could help them lead a better quality of life. And it could also save a few lives. Well, one half of our societies can allies to be aggressive and oppressive, and the other half is canalis to endure that aggression and oppression. Society cannot progress. On the contrary, it starts to regress. I do not believe the men deserve to be disrespected in any way. But that is not my aim with this talk. My aim with this talk is to show. Show you that we are all suffering from rigid, patriarchal society. A society in which we are aware of all the issues, yet we are not doing enough to change or eliminate them. I want to do my part in treating the patriarchal sickness that has plagued our society. Thank you for listening.