Overcome Bullying: Bullying Support and Resources | Shakti Ann Kanyal | TEDxLAHS
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpYLSXIqjWA Video ID: rpYLSXIqjWA ============================================================ [Music] Hello, I am Shock Dian Conell and I'll be discussing resources and support for bullying. Jocelyn Rojo, an 11-year-old girl who was severely bullied, died. She was severely bullied at her school for her immigration status. And the kids at her school said that she wasn't worthy because she was because of her immigration status. And they called agencies and threatened that her parents would get deported, leaving her all alone. This is a horrible story. Yet bullying is the reality for many teens and adolescence around the world. They are trapped and consumed with the belief there is no end to their pain. I was trapped and in a very dark place where if the pain continued, it could have consumed me. But when you're consumed, the pain rushes through your veins and you see through a distorted lens where the bad makes you forget the good. This is why we must assist victims of bullying and give them a perspective. As of 2022, this affects one in five students. Now, let's talk about perspective. Pain is only temporary. This is not how your whole life will be. These moments of pain will pass and sometimes just knowing that is enough to hold on. There are so many beautiful things life can provide. New memories to make, new friends to meet, and you'll become stronger because of it, capable of handling these situations in the future. It will get a lot easier. One of the main pains of bullying is that victims feel alone, as if the whole world is against them. For example, Jordan Demay, a popular football star at Marquette Senior High School, died due to suicide and cyber bullying. He thought he was talking to some friends, and they shared intimate photos and texts, but then he found out he was catfished, and they threatened him that either they'll expose these photos and texts or he has to pay $1,000. He didn't have those $1,000 and he didn't reach out to anyone. So, that led to his sad demise. This can happen to anyone, even the least suspecting. You'd never expect a popular football star to be dealing with all this. Yet, it can happen to anyone. Bullying is an issue that, yes, society is trying to fix, but we aren't doing enough. According to Jason Foundation, around 4,000 children attempt to take their lives each day and bullying statistics reports that those who are being bullied are nine times more likely. We must create a supportive community where victims know they're not alone. Other people are dealing with bullying, too, and others have overcome bullying, and together we can create a supportive community. I get it's hard to reach out, but it will greatly help you. Talk to a trusted parent or friend or even an anonymous volunteer service like 988 Lifeline Support. These adults can help you share the burden whenever these consuming feelings occur. And parents create low pressure conversations in situations where your kid can feel comfortable sharing things like bullying. Serious talks can raise anxiety and make them think that they're even in trouble. And for kids watching this out there, if your parents are forcing you to watch this now, like my mom with all the random videos she finds, it's because they truly care. Also, those considering therapy or counseling, I highly recommend it. Don't think of it like a doctor's visit for the troubled. Think of it as an emotional class that can help you gain perspective about your emotions. It's hard to see all the sides when you're living in a complex situation, and therapists can help you see it. Now, let's discuss coping strategies. The first one is music. Huh, music? It sounds so simple, yet music was my savior. I loved going on walks for hours and hours a day, listening to all types of songs. Whether it be songs where people are heartbroken, had trouble making friends, or were happy, which made me feel happy even if it was just for a few moments. Music helped me process similar parallels in my life. The thing about music is that it can give victims a sense that they're not alone. Listening to different lines of songs and picturing themselves in it gives them tools to deal with their situation. Also, music makes you feel heard, like someone out there is also going through that same pain. And sometimes that's just what you need to feel that you're not alone. So next time these difficult emotions arise, make sure to listen to music. A lot of it. Another strategy is to watch videos and read the experiences of other people who have faced bullying like you. Just by reading these experiences, you can gain different tools and you can know that other people have overcome the things you're going through. But where can I find people's stories? I wish there was a website for that. The answer is there is support and resources forbullying.org. I made this website with the goal of combating bullying as a community and society together. I have compiled different bullying resources that could have helped me when I was severely bullied and created support groups where people around the world share their experiences. So, you know you're not alone. If you're interested in sharing your story, make sure to go to support andresources forbullying.com. Also, if you feel like this website is helpful to you, make sure to check it out. Your support is greatly appreciated and needed. A recent study from the National Center for Education showed that 100% of participants either knew of bullying, witnessed bullying, or were bullied themselves. So let's calculate that 100%. So everyone this is clearly a prevalent issue but what can you do about it? Apart from going to support and resources forbullying.org and submitting your story in person see something and say something. You don't always need to smush yourself right in the middle. I get that can be awkward and most of us won't want to do that. However, there's still so much you can do. You can choose to report it to the school or online platforms like social media platforms if it's cyber bullying. You can choose to sit with people who are alone who have been bullied. And you can choose to not give attention to the bully's remarks. When a bully makes a rude joke and everyone's silent, they will feel so awkward and be prompted to not do it again. I just want you to know your pain. Your worth is not defined by others. You are enough. I'm sorry for those enduring bullying, but I promise you will learn so much from it. You will learn the skills to stand up for yourself, and you will learn how to treat people kindly because you know how it feels to be treated not so. I just want you to remember, you are not alone. Thank you.