From Extremist to Activist | James Harris | TEDxUWGreenBay
URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc4NuAfV4xs Video ID: vc4NuAfV4xs ============================================================ I grew up in a Conservative Christian house I take that back this was something else to col conservative Christianity is kind of an insult to conservative Christians television was banned from our household my father believed that A Woman's Place was in the home that being gay was a lifestyle choice that music with a beat was sinful and that Harry Potter literally taught you how to be a witch that's before we get to the weird stuff we had an old box TV from before screens were flat but the only thing it was hooked up to was a VCR when dinosaurs roam the Earth that's how people used to watch movies because my dad believed entertainment was wrong most of what we watched were coaching films for whatever sport we were in old John Wayne war movies that got a pass for some reason and bootleg copies of a post-apocalyptic Survival Guide that taught you how to make bombs and poison out of common household items as far back as I can remember my father was paranoid that the government was coming for him and his guns he thought he saw black military helicopters following him everywhere and occasionally he filed complaints about regular planes he thought were spying on him he drilled us on how to defend ourselves and frequently took me to militia meetings where a mly crew of biker gang members survivalists and ex-military folk complained about the government and also made vague plans to detain migrants at the Mexican border I might have been 10 years old but I knew that when the time came it was my job to defend our house and I was supposed to kill anyone that tried to get in after 911 he added islamophobia to the mix we lived in a really rural area attending a tiny church he was terrified that Muslims were going to come shoot up our church services and had me start carrying a pistol in a fanny pack I was 12 years old a gun is just too much destructive power for a child one time I accidentally shot a hole in his van when he found out he wasn't even mad I think he was proud that I followed the first rule of firearm safety always Point your muzzle in a safe Direction safe meaning away from people it it wasn't very safe for his van he was always preaching Gloom Doom and death Jesus was about to return the apocalypse is coming any day now or we all might die in a shootout when they come for our guns I remember desperately asking God to let me kiss a girl before the world ended I became depressed and started to self harm my mother noticed a few weeks later she loaded my three little brothers my younger sister and myself into a rusty blue minivan we headed to a domestic abuse shelter once I was out of that environment I wasted absolutely no time catching up on things that I missed I started listening to music and quickly developed a taste for death metal of all genres I was really disappointed when I watched Harry Potter and found out it wouldn't teach me how to be a wizard no sweet magic powers I finally got a chance to talk to girls when I realized I was really bad at it I tried to change teams and a couple boyfriends later I figured out that being gay isn't a choice but I took it too far I left home and started couch serving at 7 rather than deal with the Fairly minimal rules my mom set for me I started smoking doing drugs and got in a lot of trouble for really stupid things like joy riding and something called disorderly conduct with a motor vehicle doing burnouts was not the proudest smartest thing I've ever done but I did a lot of stupid attention seeking stuff because I didn't know what was wrong with me at 18 years old I was in jail depressed and miserable so why am I telling you this cool story but what's the point and how does it end I'll get there I promise the point of this talk isn't overweight man complains about his dad I've said a lot about him but I honestly don't believe he's evil he's not going to be too happy with me whenever he watches this hi Dad whenever I've been struggling he's been one of the first to offer help he's capable of being kind generous and caring but he can't understand anything that disagrees with this worldview people are incredibly complicated and it's almost impossible to judge them fairly unless you really understand them at 20 years old I had a son and becoming a parent changed my whole perspective I don't want to say I have it together now I mean does anyone really didn't think so but I learned a valuable lesson that made me a better person and parent the answers to Life's problems aren't usually found in the extremes growing up I lived two lives one in which I had no agency and another with near total freedom and both messed me up in different ways but both of those experiences has taught me valuable lessons as well my time with my father gave me discipline and a work ethic that almost feels like a real life cheat code in college my experiences after my parents divorce taught me the importance of understanding others both had valuable lessons but also had serious flaws in life activism or almost anything else you want to accomplish the result depends on how well you understand other perspectives including ones that disagree with you now I'm not making the argument that both sides always have a point and the correct solution is always compromise pictured are the results of compromising with a flat earther clearly there are times when someone is just plain wrong pun definitely intended but lately we increasingly view everyone we disagree with as being objectively wrong which kind of blinds us to problems with our own philosophies back when I was 10 years old my family attended a small Pentecostal Church in beaverdam Wisconsin for those of you who have never been to a Pentecostal service it is incredibly common for congregation members to stand up in the middle of service and share messages from God are usually something along the lines of God brings healing blessings on Linda's sore foot just wholesome messages of support and encouragement for other members of the Church community there was a woman there who stood up and spoke almost every service which absolutely infuriated my father if you looked at him while she was talking the veins in his forehead would be puffed out he'd have a red face and his neck would figuratively grow three sizes for copyright Reasons I'm not allowed to show you a picture of Anger from inside out but it makes a good mental image one day the pastor was sick my father offered to preach for him and gave a sermon about how women should be completely submissive to men more importantly they should never under any circumstances speak in church he he tried to anyway about halfway through the congregation walked out we got a phone call a few days later asking us to not come back which probably empowered more women to speak since there was one less angry man man judging them and I find something beautifully ironic in how he single-mindedly pursued his agenda to the point that it complished the exact opposite of what he intended and now trying to oppress women is an awful stupid goal but even good goals can have the same issue like animal cruelty is a serious problem but instead of finding Solutions organizations like Peta unintentionally make sure the whole world thinks animal rights activists are crazy back when I was 14 in the domestic abuse shelter I rebelled against how my father brought me up immediately we stayed there for about three months during the summer it took me two days to figure out that the library would let me rent R-rated movies mom was not too pleased when she caught me watching jackass that summer we got approved for low-income housing and by Fall I went to a public school for the very first time as a freshman it was rough before I discovered how delicious donuts are I was a pretty good-look guy but I made up for that by being incredibly weird I didn't understand any Unwritten rules of social interaction I would awkwardly stare at girls while trying to work up the courage to say hello I wasn't trying to be creepy I just was eventually I found my confidence and employed it to get into trouble I went to jail for a few months for stealing a car and also for having sex with a 17-year-old when I was 18 earning myself the wonderful experience of graduating high school while locked up side note I'm not on any Registries we got married and have been together for 13 years so I know you were all curious thank you thank you when I got out I moved in with her we had her first son a year later and a second shortly after that I changed my environment and got a chance for a fresh start but that isn't quite the end because ideas are something more powerful than logic or reasoning I rebelled against how my father brought me up I knew that God didn't smite me for going to a movie theater like Dad thought might happen I met Muslims and people from diverse backgrounds I realized everyone is more similar than different but I still felt like the world was about to end and held many of the same beliefs as my father I was a young Earth creationist and I thought of myself as a really terrible Christian that needed to get right with God at some point I didn't directly challenge or act on my beliefs life is funny a meaningless completely unremarkable event can have profound impact when I was 23 I worked the night shift at a slaughterous by the time I got home my wife and kids were sleeping so I started my normal routine of stepping outside for a joint and finding something to pass out to on Netflix I saw a documentary called creation versus evolution and out of morbid curiosity I decided I wanted to learn how in the hell anyone can possibly believe in evolution over the next 90 minutes I slowly realized that almost everything I believed was and that changed my life I worked at the Meat Plant because I thought of myself as a failure and that it was the only job I deserved I realized that I wasn't and that I was trying to fight myself trying to believe in things that I knew weren't true it took me a couple years but I started to better myself I learned to weld fabricate eventually operating robots making engine parts for cars eight years after I watched the Netflix documentary I had spent enough time fabricating and complaining about terrible blueprints that I decided I could be the one making the terrible blueprints I enrolled at w Green Bay for mechanic techical engineering because I'm pretty good at math but in my first semester here I took a gened for democracy and Justice studies that grabbed my interest so strongly that I immediately changed Majors I felt the duty to undo some of the harm I participated in and try to make the world a better place two years later among other things I'm running a program called Bridging the Divide which is it's a workshop to help people with diverse backgrounds and opinions find common ground I'm also involved in a lot of local elections in politics but this is a nonpartisan event and we've got months to get sick of politics I have a year and a half of school left the only reason I'm talking to all of you today is because I took the time to understand an idea that I disagreed with and you never know where ideas will take you I have no idea what my future is going to be but I want to spend my life searching for truth not coming up with opinions believe in something argue passionately for it just remember if you want to make a real difference you need to understand perspectives you disagree with thank you