TEDxEuclidAve - Brandon Young - The Condom Corp
The speaker parodies the modern "evil corporation" by claiming that condoms—and by extension, any concept—are gatekeepers of human experience. The central claim is that these concepts, such as Disney, Fox, and even the concept of "love," require the corporation's branding to exist. The strongest evidence is the assertion that "no love without Disney no hate without Hitler no ignorance without Fox no sex without condoms."
## Speakers & Context
- Speaker is a performer at an event through the ATC program and the Berkeley Center for New Media.
- The performance is designed to parody the concept of the global "evil Corporation" and the evil CEO thereof.
## Theses & Positions
- In modern media, there exists a concept of a "global evil Corporation" whose CEO controls various human experiences.
- Pleasure, like life itself, is a *"balancing act"*—a *"push and pull give and take silk and voltage"*—and cannot be simply encapsulated or contained.
- The speaker alleges that modern concepts (e.g., love, hate, ignorance) require the corporation’s intervention or branding to exist or be fully understood.
- The corporation claims its ultimate goal is not financial profit but to guide humanity toward perfection *by its definition*.
- The final address to future innovators suggests that true freedom comes from breaking confining structures, like the walls of a modern farm incubation process.
## Concepts & Definitions
- **Condom:** Defined by the speaker as *"a layer that stands between you and something you want."*
- **Pleasure:** Defined as a *"balancing act walking on heels in the edge of a sword push and pull give and take silk and voltage."*
- **Branding:** Positioned as the primary tool of control, creating necessary structures between humanity and experience.
## Mechanisms & Processes
- **Condom manufacturing:** Utilizing varied materials for different user "needs," including sheep skin, bear skin, and shark skin condoms.
- **Concept commercialization:** Taking abstract human experiences (childhood dreams, waking nightmares) and transforming them into branded, marketable products (e.g., Disney condom, "Dar" condom).
- **Systemic Control:** Establishing a required sequence for understanding: "We read the Bible from right to left as if it were written in Hebrew starting with lust and ending with creation."
## Named Entities
- **ATC program** — Academic program affiliation.
- **Berkeley Center for New Media** — Academic center affiliation.
- **Disney** — Example of a commercialized concept/dream.
- **Fox** — Example of a concept requiring commercial support ("no ignorance without Fox").
- **Hitler** — Example of a concept requiring commercialization ("no hate without Hitler").
## Numbers & Data
- No specific quantitative data provided outside of the comparison structure (e.g., comparing concepts to products).
## Examples & Cases
- **Condom pairing difficulty:** Customers asking to put a "his pleasure condom" inside a "her pleasure condom" to maximize pleasure, which the speaker denies due to latex damage.
- **Material innovation:** Skin for different animal types: sheep skin (for sensitivity), bear skin (for luxury), shark skin (for rough).
- **Concept entrapment examples:** Disney (childhood dreams), Dar (waking nightmares).
- **Media critique:** The assertion that "no love without Disney no hate without Hitler no ignorance without Fox no sex without condoms."
- **Farm analogy:** The process where newly hatched chicks fall through gaps from a conveyor belt, symbolizing the separation of the egg from the chick.
## Tools, Tech & Products
- **Condom:** Product used for sexual safety and, metaphorically, for mediating experience.
- **Latex:** Material used in the construction of condoms.
- **Incubated eggs/Conveyor belts:** Imagery used in the second, metaphorical passage.
## References Cited
- **The Bible:** Specifically referenced by its narrative structure, read from right to left as if in Hebrew, starting with lust and ending with creation.
## Counterarguments & Caveats
- The speaker acknowledges that the role of condoms is not solely financial, stating, *"but we are not in it for the money."*
- The perceived control mechanism is countered by the promise of liberating the listener ("we want to give Adam back his ribs we want to give Eve back her snake").
## Conclusions & Recommendations
- The speaker's overarching message transitions from a critique of corporate control to a blessing for future innovators: embrace the journey of discovery and maintain the curiosity to seek a place that is *"all green grass and sun."*
- Future innovators should view themselves as *"Travelers born in rooms too small for you."*
## Implications & Consequences
- The successful branding of core human emotions implies a mechanism for controlling thought patterns and defining what constitutes acceptable experience.
- The ultimate consequence of stagnation within safe, contained systems (like the egg/conveyor belt) is the loss of freedom and potential.
## Verbatim Moments
- *"For his pleasure and for her pleasure."*
- *"pleasure is a balancing act walking on heels in the edge of a sword push and pull give and take silk and voltage"*
- *"a condom is a layer that stands between you and something you want"*
- *"we have taken your childhood dreams and turned them into a condom called Disney"*
- *"there is no love without Disney no hate without Hitler no ignorance without Fox no sex without condoms"*
- *"we are nothing more or less than condom makers and we are in control"*
- *"we want to give Adam back his ribs we want to give Eve back her snake"*
- *"I do not regret a single kick a single pet a single flicker of curiosity about the world beyond"*
- *"if you knock you shall be answered so you knock and you knock and you knock Until That Wall comes down"*
- *"may it take you to a place that is all green grass and sun because you are Travelers born in rooms too small for you and you deserve nothing less than to find a place to call home"*